From First Year To Seventh
by marauder321
Summary: I've been reading a lot of RLSB and enjoying it so this is my contribution to this wonderful pairing. Basically a series of moments from the marauders years at Hogwarts. RLSB That means SLASH!
1. First Year, First Day

WARNING: This is Sirius/Remus and therefore slash! If you don't like, don't read, simple.

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Sirius Black was feeling scared. It was his first day at Hogwarts and he was absolutely petrified. Of course, if you were to ask him he would tell you that he was fine. According to him, he was anything but scared. You see, Sirius was eleven, and eleven is an age were you feel that you're much more mature and 'cool' than anyone younger than you. Being your typical eleven year old, Sirius felt it 'uncool' to be scared. According to him, only babies got scared. That is why, although he most definitely was, Sirius was standing there telling himself (and everyone around him who would listen) that he was not scared.

Soon the sorting hat began to call out people's names. A lot of the other first years were staring at it, entranced. Sirius wasn't. Coming from a pure-blood family, he had been told all about what the sorting hat did in minute detail by the time he was six. He nudged the boy beside him and motioned towards them, rolling his eyes. The boy beside him, who was called James, smiled but didn't say anything, not wanting to be the first one to break the silence in the hall.

After a short time Professor McGonnagal called out his name and he went to sit on the stool to be sorted. To most of the students in the Great Hall, Sirius looked extremely confident. Once again, he wasn't. It wasn't that he didn't know what was going to happen, coming from the family he did, he had known for years already, it was that he was frightened of where the hat might put him. Yes, he now admitted it, he was frightened. He could think of no houses that he would like to be in. Of course, he had boasted to everyone he had met so far that he wanted to be in Griffindor. But the truth was, he wasn't sure. Although he had no intentions of getting in to a house his family would approve of, he was rather scared of what would happen to him if he didn't. As ashamed as he was to admit it, he was frightened of his family.

The hat slipped over his eyes and he could hear it talking to him. He didn't pay much attention to it. His father had always told him that, since it could read minds, there wasn't really much point in talking to it. It probably wouldn't change anything. Sirius silently cursed himself for thinking that. By thinking that he was agreeing with his father, something he had no intention of doing.

After a while of sitting there, the hat called out, "GRIFFINDOR!" and he went over to sit at the table. Most of the pupils were cheering although a few were muttering to their friends. A Black had never been put in Griffindore before.

It was a while before any more boys were sorted into Griffindor but when they did the names were all very close together. "Lupin, Remus,"  
"Pettigrew, Peter," and finally  
"Potter, James." were all going to be sharing a dorm with him. Peter and Remus both sat down at the other end of the table. Remus reading a book and Peter attempting to make conversation with him. Obviously this attempt was futile. James, on the other hand, came straight up to him, gave him a hi-five and sat down to discuss quidditch tactics.

***

Remus was sitting on his bed reading 'Hogwarts, a history.' The curtains were pulled shut so that none of the other boys in his dorm would disturb him and a slightly crumpled piece of parchment lay on the pillow beside him. It was a letter to his mum and he meant to send it as soon as the other boys had gone to sleep. Unfortunately that didn't seem likely to be happening any time soon. He sighed and put the book down, still open so as to keep his place. He couldn't concentrate on it. Not with the noise the other boys were making. He wished he could join in but he knew that by doing so he was risking being discovered as a werewolf.

He hated being a werewolf. Most people, when they thought of how it would be if they were a werewolf, were mostly concerned about the pain of the transformations. Unfortunately, although that was an issue, there were things about it that he felt were much worse than that. The main one of these was how everyone else felt about you. No one liked werewolves. in fact, he was lucky to just get into a decent school. If it weren't for Dumbledore then- He was cut of from his thoughts by someone ripping open the curtains and sticking their head in.

"Hey, Remus! Come out of book-land and talk to us. You've been reading ever since you were sorted. We assure you we're much more interesting than-" he grabbed the book, "Hogwarts, a history." Remus turned to look at the boy, his sombre face a great contrast to the other boy's happy one, "I'm sorry, I just don't think I should..." the boy's smile flickered for a moment, but it was soon back.  
"Come on, you're going to be stuck with us for the next seven years anyway. You might as well get to know us. Anyway, James and Peter are wondering what you look like. All they've seen of you is that book and they're starting to wonder if it's permanently attached." Remus couldn't help but smile at this. Something that probably wasn't a good idea since the other boy seemed to take it as meaning that he would talk to them and was sitting on the floor with his friends, looking expectantly at him. Remus sighed, something he got the feeling he'd be doing a lot of in the next few years, but went to sit with them anyway. He couldn't get out of it now and even if he could he felt that he might as well get to know the people he would be living with for the next seven years.

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A/N:OK. I've got a few things to say so,  
1. Not much RLSB there but there will be in future chapters, don't worry.  
2. The chapters in this are going to be the short, spur of the moment, done in an hour kind, so don't expect much more than that. I'll probable update every one or two days.  
3. In case you're wondering, the next chapter is called 'Second Year, Second Best'


	2. Second Year, Second Best

A/N: Okay, here's the second chapter, sorry it's a bit late. You'll probably get another one later today.

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Remus Lupin was feeling jealous, and he had no idea why. He wasn't sure what was worse, whoever he was jealous of or the fact he didn't know who they were. Actually, maybe he did have a bit of an idea. It was most likely something to do with the fact that Sirius was dating Melissa Tompson. OK, so he wasn't exactly dating her in a very 'boyfriend and girlfriend' type way, because twelve year olds don't really do that. It was more of a 'he fancied her, she fancied him, they both knew that and often sat beside each other' way. Admittedly that can't really be considered dating, but Remus felt that he had some right to call it that now. You see, Sirius Black had just asked Melissa Tompson out.

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He hadn't actually spoken to Sirius since then (he'd been in the library) so you may be wondering how he knew. Well, there's a simple answer to that, it was hard to be a second year and not. It seemed to be the sole topic of conversation for most of the girls in his year and most of the boys had at least mentioned it to their friends in between discussion of the latest so called 'friendly' quidditch match that had taken place during lunch break. I say 'so called' because it had resulted in three people being sent to the hospital wing, two getting detention for fighting and the rest with several minor cuts and bruises.

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Now, onto the more important part of this. What about that made him jealous? Well, actually, I can't really tell you that, because he himself had no idea why. And this is why we find him, chin resting on one hand, staring at a Defence Against the Dark Arts textbook with a glazed look on his face.

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He had gone over seemingly every possible cause for his jealousy in his mind and was still just as, if not more, puzzled than he'd been before. Was he jealous of Melissa for stopping him spending time with Sirius? No, it couldn't be that, Sirius was spending just as much time with him as he had before. Was he jealous of Sirius for having Melissa fancy him? No, not that. He hardly knew her. Could it be that- No! Definitely not that! Remus Lupin was perfectly straight. The crush he had had on Louise in Hufflepuff last year proved that. Didn't it?

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By four O'clock he was just about to leave the library and had finally come up with an idea that he couldn't find fault with. He was probably just jealous that Sirius had got a girl to go out with him before him. That was probably it. It would be perfect, if it weren't for the fact he didn't really care about girls all that much and that there were plenty that would be willing to go out with him, should the need arise. But as it was, this one worked and was probably the most likely of his ideas so far.

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He picked up the book he had been reading, putting it back on the shelf, and left the library. As he walked up the stairs towards the Gryffindor common room he had time to ponder his idea and with every second that passed it seemed to become more and more unlikely. With every step he took he seemed to come up with another reason that he was wrong. In fact, by the time he got to the twenty second step (he'd been counting, a habit he'd picked up in first year) the only thing that made him believe it was his need for an answer.

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After going up another hundred or so steps, he finally got to the portrait of the fat lady. He told her the password and went into the common room t be immediately greeted by James who, although he had been gone for barely half an hour, seemed to be under the impression it had been several years. "Remus! Where the heck've you been? You ran off as spoon as we finished potions and we couldn't find you anywhere. I swear, we searched the entire castle for you!" Remus smirked,

"I take it the library isn't in the castle then?" Both James and Sirius looked slightly embarrassed due to the fact they hadn't worked this out but after a few seconds Sirius muttered something about it not being the first place that came to mind.

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There was silence for a couple of minutes after this and James seemed to be in deep thought. Finally he seemed to work something out and announced to them all that they ought to make a map or something that would show where anyone was at any time. Remus was a bit apprehensive about this but Sirius thought it was a great idea and soon they were discussing how it could be made.

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It was almost eight O'clock by the time they stopped talking about it and got up to start mapping out he castle. "We should probably split up to do this," James pointed out, "that way we'll get it done quicker." Sirius nodded is head in agreement,

"We should go in groups of two. That way we won't have to work by ourselves."

"Okay." James said, stopping walking just outside the portrait hole. Without thinking about it, Remus added in, "I'll go with Sirius." James looked slightly disappointed, Remus supposed he had wanted to go with Sirius, but agreed anyway and they each set off in a different direction to start the mapping out of the school.

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As Remus and Sirius walked along in silence, Remus couldn't help but notice how fast he had been to add that he wanted to walk with Sirius. He hoped nobody else had noticed because this seemed to make it obvious that perhaps his third idea had been right. Perhaps Remus Lupin, Marauder and werewolf had another word that would describe him. Perhaps he _was_ gay. "Shit!" he said out loud, causing Sirius to look round smirking. He blushed slightly as Sirius kept on walking. This idea, he couldn't find any faults with.

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A/N: Please review. Also, so that I can be lazy and don't have to think up names, does anyone want to a random person in this? Just leave your first name in a review and I'll use it if I need a name for someone. You might also want to say if there's any type of person you especially do or don't want to be.

EDIT: I've changed the rating because I'm not sure about that little swear word at the end. Could someone tell me if that's allowed in T rated fics.


	3. Third Year, Third Time Lucky

A/N: This chapter jumps about in time a bit, I hope you don't get too confused.

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Remus stumbled into the common room feeling slightly confused. Ever since he'd realised the truth about his sexuality last year he had been trying to ignore it. Of course, this had been rather hard, but he'd managed. Until now. After what had just happened it seemed pointless to even try. Instead he was focussing on it as much as he could. Trying to make some sense of the previous events. Events that he felt his life would have been much simpler without.

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"Hey! Remus! We're over here!" James shouted, waving from the other side of the common room. Seemingly his friends had not yet noticed the look on his face that said quite clearly that he didn't want to be disturbed. He sighed, realising how unlikely it was that he would be able to get a moments peace so that he could think. As he walked over to the fireplace that his friends had somehow managed to get seats around, they seemed to notice his confused expression. "Hey Remus, what happened?" James asked with a hint of pity in his voice. Remus wasn't sure what to tell them. He mulled over his choices for a minute of so before deciding that the truth was probably the best option. "I- well- I suppose I've kind of got a date for Hogsmead." James and Sirius- both failing to see anything that could be wrong with this- smiled. Much to Remus' annoyance. You couldn't really blame them, he supposed. They had both been under the impression the bad mood Remus had been in the last few weeks was because of Sirius asking Melissa if she wanted to go to Hogsmead with him. Actually, they were right. It just wasn't for the reason they thought. "So... Who is it?" asked Sirius. Remus sighed in defeat before replying, "Robert Heriot in Ravenclaw."

***

"Remus! Come over here a sec." A boy in Ravenclaw waved at Remus, calling him over to his house's table. Remus looked towards his friends, silently asking if they minded. They nodded, showing they didn't, and he went over to the Ravenclaw table.

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"Hey Robert." he said, leaning forward over the table slightly so as to be at a better distance from him to talk. Robert looked slightly nervous but didn't mention anything about it, "I was just thinking, we haven't talked for a while. Do you want to meet up in the library after Transfiguration?"

"'Course," replied Remus, "I need to get some homework done anyway, and Sirius, James and Peter aren't the best people to help with that." The other boy smiled slightly, looking vaguely relieved.

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Remus went back over to the Gryffindor table to talk to his other friends and found them waiting, looking curious. "Isn't that Robert? I thought you didn't talk to him much any more."

"No, not much, but he wants to meet me in the library to do homework after transfiguration. You guys don't mind do you." Sirius shook his head.

"Nah, we're going to be pranking anyway. James has got this great idea..." and so, the conversation topic changed and the meeting was practically forgotten.

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***

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"Hi Remus, I see you remembered to come then."

"Yeah," Remus replied, "Sorry I'm slightly late. James kept going on about this new prank idea his got. It involves bright red paint and-" He suddenly stopped short. Xxx laughed, "Let me guess. You're not supposed to tell any one?" Remus smiled, showing that he was correct. "So what did you bring me here for anyway? Apart from to discuss James' prank ideas of course." Robert sighed and Remus wondered if something was wrong. "I suppose I ought to get it over with now." He said. Yep, something was definitely wrong. "I haven't really told anyone this and I wasn't sure if I should and I wanted to tell you but I wasn't sure how you'd react and then I thought, you're not the sort of person who would mind and even if you did, you wouldn't tell anybody but I still wasn't sure and I've just finally decided to tell you and I think I might be chickening out but anyway I just kind of well... I like boys and, um, well, I kinda like you." Remus stood, shocked, for a while. Talk about run on sentences! But finally managed to think of something to say. "Um, well, do you want to go to Hogsmead with me. I mean, Sirius is already going with someone and James has got this stupid crush on Lily that he won't stop raving about, so, do you." Robert smiled, seemingly glad,

"Yeah."

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***

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James looked slightly shocked and Sirius had an unreadable expression on his face. Peter seemed to be the only one who wasn't fazed by this news. He shrugged, "That's nice." there was a few more seconds silence before James suddenly burst into laughter and started banging his fist on the table. Remus looked on shocked. Had his friend gone mad? James finally managed to choke out, "So that's why you wouldn't get together with Joey or Megan!" Sirius started laughing too when he said the second of the names, "Honestly James! That's hardly the only reason he didn't like Megan that much! She's hardly the nicest person I know!" Peter too started laughing when he said this, and left Remus to sit there, one eyebrow raised, watching his friends fall into hysterics around him.

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Finally James managed to gain some composture and he was followed by Sirius and Peter in turn. James cleared his throat, "Well, um, I just want you to know, we don't care. It's just like when we found out you were a werewolf. Although lots of other people might not like it, we don't care. You're still our friend. Werewolf or not. Gay or not." Sirius and Peter both nodded in agreement to this (surprisingly heartfelt, coming from James" statement. "Yeah, Remus, we don't care and we'll hex anyone who does." Sirius leant back against the chair again, once again with a strange look in his eyes.

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Meanwhile Megan watched, jealous.

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A/N: Here you are, another chapter. There isn't going to be any more to the Megan thing, I just thought I'd add that on the end. (I still need ideas for names.) Oh, and yes, I just HAD to put in that comment Remus made about grammar. If you can guess why Roberts second name is Heriot you get... OK, nothing, but well done if you work it out.

Sorry about the Xxx thing, I was half asleep when I posted it and forgot to change it to his name. It's fixed now.


	4. Fourth Year, Forth Road Bridge

A/N:Yes, I have broken the pattern of the chapter names! Don't worry (although I assume you weren't, but saying that helps with the needless dramatics) the proper pattern will be resumed shortly.

WARNING: Discussion of suicide!

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Sirius sat in the car watching Remus. Most of the journey had been spent thinking about how lucky he was to be able to stay at Remus' for the holidays. Not once had they talked, both wrapped up in their own private thoughts. Up until now they had both been content with that, neither of really them wanted to know what the other was thinking, but now Sirius was worried. Since they had drove onto the bridge and Remus' dad had pointed out the rail bridge, a short distance across the water, Remus had been staring out of the window. He was not, as it may first have appeared, admiring the structure of the rail bridge, but instead his eyes were fixed on the waters of the river Forth that ran below. Sirius would have thought nothing of it, if it weren't for the fact Remus, instead of having a slightly glazed look in his eyes, such as you might expect of someone completely lost in their thoughts, was staring at the river with a look of utmost concentration and also, despite the fact he hid it well, a hint of sadness.

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Sirius reached across the gap in between them, laying an arm over his friends shoulder to comfort him. It was only as he did so, and found Remus much nearer than he had expected, that he realized that he had been unknowingly leaning towards him. He jerked back slightly, hoping no one had noticed. Remus, feeling Sirius' arm being suddenly pulled away from his shoulder, turned around to look at him. "What is it?" he asked, unsure wether he should feel annoyed or glad that Sirius had pulled him out of his reminiscing. Sirius sighed and looked down at his robes in what Remus nearly mistook to be embarrassment. But it couldn't be, if there was one thing Sirius didn't get, it was embarrassed. Sirius looked up again and Remus was shocked to realize that he really was embarrassed, but what was it that made him feel like that?

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Sirius sat there, not saying anything, for a few moments before he decided to voice his thoughts, "I was just wondering, what were you thinking when you were looking down there?" Remus sighed, this wasn't really something he wanted to discuss. Especially not with Sirius. But with the way Sirius was looking at him, so concerned for his wellbeing, he couldn't help but let it all out. And so, leaning in towards sirius and lowering his voice so his parents wouldn't hear, he told Sirius one of his deepest secrets.

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"When I was twelve, after you'd sent me that letter saying you knew what I was, I didn't know that you didn't care. I know you didn't mean it, but there was nothing in the letter to suggest that you were okay with having a werewolf for a friend. I thought that you didn't want to be my friend anymore, that when we got back to school you would tell everyone and I would have to leave. I never had any friends before Hogwarts. I suppose I didn't mind because I hadn't experienced friendship before. My parents kept me way from other people. It wasn't because they didn't want me to have any friends, they just didn't want me to lose any. Then when I got to Hogwarts it changed. At first I tried to keep away from you. Do you remember our first day? At first you didn't even know what I looked like. Fortunately I didn't succeed, we became really good friends. Then in the summer holidays you sent me that letter and I thought I had lost you all for ever. I stayed in my bedroom crying that day. My parents had no idea what was wrong.

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"I suppose, although I didn't think it at the time, I was depressed. My parents didn't know anything about it. It wasn't their fault, of course, I tried to hide my sadness. I thought that if they knew then it would just be even more people upset because of it." By now, Remus didn't seem to be concentrating at all, but rather thinking aloud. "It was very strange getting back to school. You completely accepted me and I was happy again. It was a strange feeling, as if a huge weight had been lifted from me. Suddenly everything I had thought while I was depressed seemed stupid. Soon after I looked at a letter I had written during that time and it seemed as though it was written by a different person.

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"I suppose I should really stop procrastinating and get to the point. During the holidays we went to visit my grandparents, we always do. Anyway, we were visiting the ones that live nearby, not the ones in England, and they live very near to the place where we drove on to the Forth road bridge. As we were driving over, I had a thought. I've no idea what made me think it was a good idea at that time. I mean, it seems completely stupid now, but at the time I didn't think anyone liked me anymore and I, well, I decided to kill my self." Without thinking about it, Sirius reached over to hug Remus. Remus blushed slightly, but otherwise raised no objections.

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Even though Remus seemed to be perfectly alright with Sirius hugging him, it seemed to have shaken him out of his slightly sombre, reflective mood. He finished off the story quickly and with a much more ironic tone, "Obviously, I didn't go through with it. At least, I don't think I did. For all I know this could be the after life." 'and it certainly feels like heaven.' he added in his head, but didn't dare to speak it out loud. Sirius chuckled slightly and bit back the many comments he was going to make about Remus' recent revelations in favour of an approach that better matched his friends. "You know, at first I thought you were looking at the rail bridge. I mean, it is quite interesting if you haven't seen it before."

"Well," pointed out Remus, "that's why I wasn't looking at it then. I see it at least ten times a year."

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A/N: Sorry I didn't manage to get this up sooner. I would tell you that I'll get the next chapter up in the next few days but as you can see from the last few I probably won't manage to put it up on time.

Please review and tell me wether I'm actually any good at angsty parts. Also, I'm going to put up a poll to see what people would prefer to see in the upcoming chapters, just for one part that I'm not sure of. It would be great if people could vote for something.


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